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Want to Lead A Successful Job Search? It May Come Down to How Consistent You Are

4/3/2019

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There is a behavior that we rarely hear about when it comes to job searching and that’s consistency. So often we emphasize grander notions such as knowing who you are and what you want, or the more practical details of actualizing your goals, such resume and cover letter writing.  And networking, which is of utmost importance. 
 
It’s true, a successful search is difficult without answering the bigger questions, perfecting your job search materials, or building a responsive network.  
 
Yet, what separates those that succeed from those who don’t frequently comes down not to these elements but the idea that lies in between – the consistency with which you approach executing your plans. 
 
Consistent action is defined by regularity and commitment. Its bedrock is the understanding that even when your most well laid out plans go up in flames, you keep going. When you make the choice to be consistent, you make a pact with yourself to take committed action regardless of how you feel on a given day.  
 
It may be easy to commit when you feel hopeful and optimistic. You probably won’t have much trouble motivating yourself at the beginning stages of the job search.  You’ll know what you have to do. Updating your resume and on-line presence must come before any outreach and usually is a step that can be completed independently.  Reaching out to people you know for informational interviews is a low-risk proposition and relatively straightforward. You’ll meet for coffee to gather intel on your company of choice. You’ll mine for additional networking contacts. 
 
You’ll feel that you are making progress. 
 
But inevitably you’ll hit a bump. Perhaps your outreach to your extended network goes unanswered, or worse yet, you’ll go through rounds of interviews only to get passed over.  
 
You’ll have a bad day. Maybe a series of bad days. No big deal, you’ve been through worse, you’ll tell yourself. 
 
But then another “no” is in your in-box.  Slowly, you start to lose motivation.  Your resolve to keep going begins to waver. Before long, a few weeks go by and the job search is officially on hold. 
 
*Pause*
 
But, wait, this isn’t how you intended it to play out. 
 
And no, the story doesn’t have to play out that way. 
 
After all, remember, you’ve made a commitment to yourself at the start -- to stay consistent and keep going no matter what. 
 
So, you shake the negative stuff off.  
 
You tell yourself that even if you need to take some time to recover, your best shot at success is to continue the outreach as soon as practically possible. 
 
You have a plan and a schedule that you’ve been following all along. A daily commitment -- to research companies and e-mail prospective contacts for x number of hours.  A weekly goal – to attend 2-3 networking events and target 7-8 new contacts per week.  And yes, your other projects need your regular attention – a personal portfolio, a website, or another on-line tool to showcase your professional attributes. 
 
You consistently maintain the pace towards these goals despite the setbacks and despite other life challenges that always tend to creep in the way. You follow through in a dedicated way and keep yourself accountable by setting concrete deadlines and making your commitments public.  You enlist trusted friends, a mentor or a coach to help you stay accountable as well.  
 
Your intentions and your actions are aligned.   
 
You keep taking steps forward. You are slow and steady. It’s not a race, but I think we all know how that story ends. 

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What If...Waiting Wasn't an Option?

10/25/2017

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The fall has finally arrived, and with it, the need to re-organize my closet.  Every year at this time I carve out some time to put away the shorts, tank tops and dresses, and pull out the cozy sweaters, leggings and jeans. The crisp air outside motivates me not to delay.
 
Yet, I can’t say that I particularly enjoy this process.  Yes, this is a great opportunity to re-evaluate my wardrobe and to get rid of things I no longer like. I know the 80/20 rule – that most of us wear just 20 percent of our wardrobe 80 percent of the time.  In my case, it’s more like 10 percent of the wardrobe 99 percent of the time.  But still, for one reason or another, I hesitate to minimize.
 
It’s tedious. It’s time consuming. And most of all, there is that perennial question that hangs over my carefully curated closet…what if?
 
What if I change my mind? What if I come to regret it? What if I grow to like this piece again? What if? What if? What if?
 
It strikes me that in some ways this process of decision-making is similar to the way that many career changers approach their transition. 
 
You know that the career you’ve chosen to pursue is no longer working.  Deep down you know it’s time to make a change. Yet this realization remains just an inkling while you rationalize to yourself why you shouldn’t. 
 
Last week, I attended a panel on career transitions, where a room full of want-to-be career changers listened to sage advice and insight of those who already found their career holy grail.
 
The number one take-away?
 
Don’t wait.
 
Waiting, and then finally taking the plunge towards a new career, months, or sometimes years later, seemed to have been the common thread in all the stories shared that evening.
 
Someone waited because they felt they invested too much time and money into their education. Someone waited because they wanted to finish the degree they already knew was not the right fit -- but they had only one year to go in school. Someone waited because they didn’t want to move – moving ended up leading them to a network of new connections and ultimately, discovering how to blend their interests into a profitable business.  Finally, someone waited because they didn’t know what else to do.  They had been following the safe path of getting a good degree, finding a good job, and making good money.
 
All the panelists ultimately woke up and realized they’ve been waiting long enough. The time had come to make a change.
 
In hindsight, they all were acutely aware of the passage of time – the time they spent waiting vs. the time they spent actively in transition – one period marked by uncertainly, hesitation, depression, and rationalization; the other period marked by empowering decisions that brought them closer to their dreams.
 
The take-away was not to wait.  Even if the only thing you knew with certainty was that you didn’t like what you currently did.
 
At the end of the event, the moderator turned to the audience. Any last questions?
 
There was one.
 
What signs do I look for as I try to identify what I should do next?
 
Look for things that bring you joy was the response of one of the panelists.  What are the things you gravitate to over and over again?
 
What are the favorites in your closet? Everything else can go or take its honorary place in the back. 

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If Only I Could Be That Brave, said everyone

3/29/2017

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If you ever saw the movie “Three Kings”, you may remember this great scene with Archie Gates (George Clooney) and Conrad Vig (Spike Jonze), where they talk about courage. American soldiers stationed in the Gulf at the very end of war, they are about to attempt to rescue their friend from an enemy bunker. But Conrad expresses concern.
 
Archie Gates: You are scared, right?
Conrad Vig: Maybe.
Archie Gates: The way it works is, you do the thing you are scared sh!tless of, and you get the courage AFTER you do it, not before you do it.
Conrad Vig: That’s a dumb way to work. It should be the other way around.
Archie Gates: I know. That’s the way it works.
 
It would certainly be easier if it was the other way around. If all of us had this magical stockpile of courage, we could easily do what we were most scared of.  Arguably, then, everyone would be living their best, most expansive life. Or at least, attempting to.
 
But that is not how it works…
 
We have to take conscious action to overcome danger and face our fears. But even before we decide what action to take, we have to make another fundamental choice. We have to decide whether we allow the experience of risk and fear into our daily lives.
 
Most of us don’t have to put our lives on the line in battle.  We don’t have to showcase courage by doing something heroic. We have the luxury to wake up each morning, feeling generally safe, and go about our days choosing to act in a way that doesn’t put us at risk.  We can ignore our fears and avoid going outside our comfort zone. 
 
We don’t really need to be courageous.
 
Facing your fears means feeling discomfort. It means possible failure. And not everyone wants to feel discomfort. Very few of us, if any, want to risk failure. 
 
I recently came across and watched again the now famous 2005 Stanford University commencement speech by Steve Jobs.  The three stories from his life that he shares, about 1) connecting the dots after taking an unconventional path of dropping out of college, 2) having to start over after a very public failure (getting fired from Apple), and 3) his cancer diagnosis, all converge in one powerful underlying message:
 
Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.
 
That is a wonderful, inspiring message. But what if you don’t feel courageous? What if you are terrified of change? What if you don’t want to seem a fool? What if you are struggling to make this harder choice?
 
“I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You’ve got to find what you love,” Jobs says. 
 
Jobs was by any measure fortunate – he found what he loved when he was young. But he was also not immune to self-doubt in the face of rejection and had to overcome many obstacles and failures before he ultimately regained his footing and built a company that is now an icon around the world.  
 
Perhaps Jobs found the winning formula for being and staying bold.  Going towards challenges, embracing risk and confronting fear will never be as easy as staying in your comfort zone, at least on the surface.  But it is a much easier choice to make when you do it in the service of what you love.



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When You Don't Know What You Want To Do

11/23/2015

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A few days ago, on the way to school my girls started talking about what they want to be when they grow up.  Until recently, their horizon of available options included only one of two career paths: a painter or a ballerina.  But, suddenly something shifted in their field of vision and a range of new possibilities appeared. 
 
My older daughter triumphantly declared that she is going to be a doctor.  Half expecting that my younger daughter would say she wants to be a doctor too, I was pleasantly surprised there was a twist to that story.  My youngest was going to be a vet.  
 
Then, just as suddenly as the spark lit, it flickered.  My 5 year-old hesitated. She started to become upset. Maybe she didn’t want to be a doctor after all?  Maybe she would be an artist?  Or could she be an artist AND a doctor?  In her hesitation I saw a wish to not have to decide…she was afraid to limit herself to one choice.  What if she made the wrong one?
 
I reassured her that those were both great options, and yes, if she wanted to, she could do both.  She had lots of time to decide, and while it was ok to feel scared, she shouldn’t let that get her stuck.  She just needed to explore to learn what was most exciting for her.
 
I feel that it is my job as a parent to not only help my kids discover their interests and passions, but also help them acquire the social and emotional tools to turn their dreams into reality.  The fickleness of a 5 year-old will pass and one day my daughter will settle on a career.  But, I predict that either before or after she makes her choice, there will be periods when she feels uncertain, stuck, or paralyzed about what to do with her life.  And at those forks in the road, the outcome will largely depend on how she handles her doubts and indecisions.
 
As a career coach who works with people in transition, I am used to dealing with this state of emotional paralysis.  Change is scary, especially when you don’t have a clear goal in mind.  Although I’ve worked with people with different personalities at different stages of transition, virtually everyone at one point or another has some fear that blocks them from moving forward.  Many are afraid to take a wrong step and to make a ‘mistake’. 
 
Recently, I participated in a webinar ran by a fellow career coach entitled “How To Make a Change When You Don’t Know What You Want To Do”.  It seemed like a misnomer at first, because I thought as typical wisdom goes, it’s much easier to make a change when you can clearly articulate what you are moving towards. 
 
But her message was not about getting clarity but about taking action.  It ‘s not that it isn’t important to get clarity.  It is. But for those of us who struggle to define our next role, she counseled, it was better to do something, even fearing failure, rather than do nothing at all.  She then laid out a plan on how to network when you weren’t sure exactly what to say.
 
I enjoyed the webinar because of the perspective it offered.  It was a good reminder of what we often forget as adults.  With our need to get things right, we can forget that making mistakes is a necessary part of the learning process. 
 
When we remember that we can discover a lot more when put our fears aside, as we often remind our kids, we get closer to our dreams.  We will all make mistakes – that’s for certain – and it will not be the end of the road but the beginning. 
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Facing Fear and Indecision

10/14/2014

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We’ve all had a case of what ifs.  What if it’s not the right move? What if I fail? What if they don’t like me? What if I can’t hack it? So often the what ifs subtly but persistently tug us away from what our heart most desires.  If you’ve ever tried to step out of your comfort zone, you know what I am talking about.  Whether it’s speaking in front of a crowd, traveling alone, switching jobs, or even something as small as opening up to a new friend, the what ifs, the fear of the unknown can stop you cold in your tracks.

Fear is a powerful derailer. But it doesn’t have to be. Perhaps one of life’s biggest challenges is learning how to embrace the fears that paralyze us, learn from them, and to go for your dream anyway. 

After my leave of absence was over, I came back to my old job.  I wasn’t ready to quit. The Coaching classes opened my eyes to a new possibility. One that I wanted to pursue further.  But I wasn’t yet ready to tackle the unknown of being unemployed, and of closing off all of my other options.  In truth, I was scared.  Even though my intuition told me that I was on the right track, I couldn’t let go of the paralyzing what ifs.
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It is remarkable how talented we can be at making excuses, going down different (easier!) roads, so that we don’t have to face our fears. 

Still unhappy in my current job, I created a list of workable alternatives. Those mostly consisted of different jobs in my current field – I thought I could hold on to the safety of what I knew, while improving on the role I was performing.  

When you are in the wrong place, or trying to climb up the wrong tree, life has a way of gently reminding you of your foolishness as the tree branches continually smack you in the face on your way up.

I was getting rejected. Perhaps what was not yet clear to me was clear to everyone else.  Although painful, this exercise proved to be a valuable next step.  It gave me more clarity.

As I let go of the safe alternatives, I began to explore my other options that would necessitate a bigger life adjustment.  Slowly I began to narrow down my list. 


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You are at career crossroads. What's next?

10/7/2014

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If it’s not the first time you woke up with a sense of anxiety about going to work, you are not alone.  Often we go through the motions of making it though yet another day while knowing deep down that we are in the wrong place. Yet something is stopping us from moving on.  This was exactly where I was 6-7 years ago.

Deeply unfulfilled but nonetheless succeeding in my chosen field (banking regulation), I knew that something was amiss but didn’t know where to start to get my life back on the right track. I had ideas (perhaps too many ideas!) about where I’d rather be, but somehow felt that I wasn’t ready to commit to any of them. 

​Was teaching a better fit for me? Or was it Education Administration? Or perhaps something more along the lines of Human Resources or Organizational Development? Should I get a Masters in Social Work? Or maybe a position in a non-profit where I could help to solve local or global problems? There were too many options and I was clearly lost.

By then I had vague ideas of what I enjoyed doing and even better notions of what I didn’t.  It turned out that was a good place to start. One day at work (desperate to do anything else but the current task at hand), I made a list of my strengths and everything I thought I was good at.  A common thread that ran through the list was that I liked working with people (teaching, counseling, building connections, etc) and I liked to help them solve problems.  So, what on earth brought me to banking? Well….it must have been my interview skills…

I bought a few books on career change. I took a personality assessment. As I struggled to get through my days at the office, it helped to focus some of my energy on figuring out a way forward.  The clerk at the self-help section of the Wall Street Barnes and Noble began to smile at me as I approached.  I felt like I was playing a game of hot and cold.  I was getting warmer. But I still was unsure of where I belonged.

What do you do if you don’t know where to begin? How do you re-group and re-evaluate your options?

First of all.  Step back. Create some distance. 

I decided to take a leave of absence.  My goal: uninterrupted time to evaluate options. I found an intensive month-long course offering in Coaching at NYU.  The timing was right, the financial commitment was low, and it sounded like my cup of tea. This was the serendipitous beginning of my newfound path.  
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    Author

    Natasha Kosoff is a career coach and advocate for women's growth and development. She is committed to helping women achieve fulfillment and success in their careers and balance in their lives. 




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