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Interviewing and Making a Decision

10/29/2014

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I got an interview at a non-profit that ran an after-school program for underserved kids.  Their mission was to help kids develop important life skills, like critical thinking and problem solving, and to help them succeed academically by teaching the game of chess.  They were looking for a chess instructor. 

There was only one problem.  The chess instructor had to know how to play chess.  The last time I played chess was in first grade.  I remembered the names of the pieces but not where most of them went on the board or, really, much else.

I was told I had to come to the interview prepared to do a chess lesson. This was almost as scary as if someone told me I had to impersonate Beyonce in front of a couple thousand fans.

But here is the thing. When your back is against the wall but you really want something, that’s when the fun begins. I got creative.

After scouring the internet for all I could find about chess, I learned the moves and some of the basic strategies.  If you ever played the game of chess, you know that it’s a complex game, which favors those players that can think ahead, plan their moves in advance, and deploy numerous strategies based on the different position of the chess pieces. It’s no wonder it is popular in schools and after-school programs – it teaches self-regulation, problem solving and critical thinking – the kinds of skills that position you for success in life.

I got to the interview wearing my nicest black suit, and carrying a portfolio with my resume and cardboard cut-outs of chess pieces.  I was ready!

I am pretty sure the turning point in the interview came when I pulled my arts and crafts out of my bag to do the chess lesson. 

A few days later I got the call. I was hired!

I should have been elated. Here was my chance to move on to doing something that was meaningful for me. I knew I would enjoy the teaching component.  Working with older kids would be rewarding – I’d mentor and encourage and help to position them for their next phase, college.  From my experience in the interview, I knew I’d like the team.

But instead of celebrating, I was worried. 

The job required substantial travel.  The hours were irregular.  My enthusiasm would carry me in the beginning, but was this a good long-term plan?

I said no.  It was the first job offer I turned down.  It was also the first time I made an intentional choice in my career rather than following the path that was unfolding before me.  Saying no to things I didn’t want after this became easier.  A few months later I quit my banking job. 


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Getting Clear and Tapping Your Network

10/21/2014

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The common wisdom is that it’s easier to get an interview when you are applying for jobs, when you know someone internally. Wouldn’t it be great if you knew the hiring manager, or the HR director who posted the job? Those are usually the people who have the power to bring you in or keep you out as you are trying to get your foot through the hiring door.  Of course it would.  But if you don’t know that person, you can usually get the necessary introductions if you know how to tap your network.

We all know someone who can open doors for us.  There are well known statistics that confirm that over 80% of job seekers get their jobs through someone they know. Oftentimes, however, we tend to rush the process.  How many of those people land the jobs only to find out a short time later that they again are at the wrong place?

Getting clarity about what you want takes time but is an investment that pays off in the end.  The same people that make the introductions are there, just as importantly, to provide us with valuable information about the nature of the job, or the culture of the organization where we want to work.  After all, that job that looks so good on paper may not sound quite so hot after you do a little more research. 

After I narrowed down my list of career options, I began to talk to people.  I quickly learned that the best way to find out if the job is the right fit (short of getting the job), is to do it for a really short time – a day to be exact – the technical name for this is shadowing.  Second best way? Informational interviews.  The shadowing and the informational interviewing took me to some fun places.  I spent time in an elementary school classroom.  A few hours was enough time to help me realize I would not survive long in a room full of little kids!

I had coffee with a social worker and a lunch with an HR recruiter.  I was attracted to the helping professions and it was becoming easier to visualize myself in those kinds of jobs.  The more information I got, the more I understood how my own personal preferences, interests and values would fit in with the various job descriptions.  Going through this brought me back to my days as a student-athlete, when my swim coach would have the team lie on the deck and visualize our next race in detail.  Seeing the picture of what you want to happen play out in your mind creates laser sharp focus.  And there are no better prerequisites for achieving your goal than focusing exactly on what you want.

These were great learning points, and as I got more information, I began to apply for specific positions in the non-profit training and coaching space.  I looked at traditional job boards, company postings, but tried to focus much of my effort on tapping my network and, if the position seemed like the right fit, asking my friends, former colleagues and acquaintances to pass on my resume.

In the end, though, I got my foot through the door in a very unlikely fashion. Cold call. 


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Facing Fear and Indecision

10/14/2014

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We’ve all had a case of what ifs.  What if it’s not the right move? What if I fail? What if they don’t like me? What if I can’t hack it? So often the what ifs subtly but persistently tug us away from what our heart most desires.  If you’ve ever tried to step out of your comfort zone, you know what I am talking about.  Whether it’s speaking in front of a crowd, traveling alone, switching jobs, or even something as small as opening up to a new friend, the what ifs, the fear of the unknown can stop you cold in your tracks.

Fear is a powerful derailer. But it doesn’t have to be. Perhaps one of life’s biggest challenges is learning how to embrace the fears that paralyze us, learn from them, and to go for your dream anyway. 

After my leave of absence was over, I came back to my old job.  I wasn’t ready to quit. The Coaching classes opened my eyes to a new possibility. One that I wanted to pursue further.  But I wasn’t yet ready to tackle the unknown of being unemployed, and of closing off all of my other options.  In truth, I was scared.  Even though my intuition told me that I was on the right track, I couldn’t let go of the paralyzing what ifs.
​
It is remarkable how talented we can be at making excuses, going down different (easier!) roads, so that we don’t have to face our fears. 

Still unhappy in my current job, I created a list of workable alternatives. Those mostly consisted of different jobs in my current field – I thought I could hold on to the safety of what I knew, while improving on the role I was performing.  

When you are in the wrong place, or trying to climb up the wrong tree, life has a way of gently reminding you of your foolishness as the tree branches continually smack you in the face on your way up.

I was getting rejected. Perhaps what was not yet clear to me was clear to everyone else.  Although painful, this exercise proved to be a valuable next step.  It gave me more clarity.

As I let go of the safe alternatives, I began to explore my other options that would necessitate a bigger life adjustment.  Slowly I began to narrow down my list. 


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You are at career crossroads. What's next?

10/7/2014

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If it’s not the first time you woke up with a sense of anxiety about going to work, you are not alone.  Often we go through the motions of making it though yet another day while knowing deep down that we are in the wrong place. Yet something is stopping us from moving on.  This was exactly where I was 6-7 years ago.

Deeply unfulfilled but nonetheless succeeding in my chosen field (banking regulation), I knew that something was amiss but didn’t know where to start to get my life back on the right track. I had ideas (perhaps too many ideas!) about where I’d rather be, but somehow felt that I wasn’t ready to commit to any of them. 

​Was teaching a better fit for me? Or was it Education Administration? Or perhaps something more along the lines of Human Resources or Organizational Development? Should I get a Masters in Social Work? Or maybe a position in a non-profit where I could help to solve local or global problems? There were too many options and I was clearly lost.

By then I had vague ideas of what I enjoyed doing and even better notions of what I didn’t.  It turned out that was a good place to start. One day at work (desperate to do anything else but the current task at hand), I made a list of my strengths and everything I thought I was good at.  A common thread that ran through the list was that I liked working with people (teaching, counseling, building connections, etc) and I liked to help them solve problems.  So, what on earth brought me to banking? Well….it must have been my interview skills…

I bought a few books on career change. I took a personality assessment. As I struggled to get through my days at the office, it helped to focus some of my energy on figuring out a way forward.  The clerk at the self-help section of the Wall Street Barnes and Noble began to smile at me as I approached.  I felt like I was playing a game of hot and cold.  I was getting warmer. But I still was unsure of where I belonged.

What do you do if you don’t know where to begin? How do you re-group and re-evaluate your options?

First of all.  Step back. Create some distance. 

I decided to take a leave of absence.  My goal: uninterrupted time to evaluate options. I found an intensive month-long course offering in Coaching at NYU.  The timing was right, the financial commitment was low, and it sounded like my cup of tea. This was the serendipitous beginning of my newfound path.  
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    Author

    Natasha Kosoff is a career coach and advocate for women's growth and development. She is committed to helping women achieve fulfillment and success in their careers and balance in their lives. 




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